My guess is that you have literally hundreds of old friends, and not just the ones spanning the four decades of your political career.
Of course you have thousands of new friends, at least as far as we are concerned. We've shaken your hand and talked briefly, and everything about your engaging of us reeks of friendship.
So like thousands of other unsubstantiated friends, we raise a glass to you and all those lucky ones for whom the connection is more than fleeting.
The difference between a "friend" and friendly is the amount of personal one-on-one time spent together. Thousands of use (even old people) appreciate Robert, but don't confuse that with being "friends" unless we spend one-on-one time with him. (Even though, given a chance, we would love to spend quality one-on-one time with him.)
I agree with you David. That is why Old friends are so special because we have spent years of interacting with them and engaged in activities face to face and before technology was even invented. I really like what you said..."The difference between a "friend" and friendly is the amount of personal one-on-one time spent together". So true David. A true "friend" is priceless and should be cherished. Thank you.
I am so sorry for your losses, realized and pending, and for all of ours.
I find myself surprised, sometimes, which deaths catch me by the throat.
My most recent friends are the ones whose loss I most dread. With reason, as they are all in their 80s, 90s, or even 100s, as well as wise and brave and witty.
Thanks for writing this post... with today's all-and-every t hing, old friends and grandkids remind us of life's greatest meaning. This brought tears to my heart with misty eyes. I'm re-inspired to make the effort to connect as I have. We all need this joy!
I too lost two old friends this year, both of them since childhood. Sometimes something will come to mind and I think I need to ask "friend" about that or I can't remember some fact or other and I think, "friend" will know and I'm ready to call..... and then I'm brought up short by reality and the loss. Like family members we love who have passed away, friends too are always with us, one way or another.
Annie, I've been lucky not to have lost an old friend recently, as far as I know, and the shame is that I haven't been in touch with enough of them to know whether they're even alive. I extend my sympathies to Bob, who must have suffered a painful loss. Thank you for reminding us, sir, that old friendships are to be treasured.
My mother certainly would have refuted your proposition! She kept up her Eastern Star sisterhood from childhood. She participated in a "club" of High-school friends from the 1930's on to death. She had another circle of friends she kept in touch with from Class of '40 UC Berkeley. She made and kept in touch with friends from trips abroad from 1963 and 1968 and 1970 until her death age 91. I helped her print and send two-page Christmas letters to a list of nearly 200 friends in her latter days. There was no clock running on "friendship" with her. Me, I enjoy a quip with a stranger.
Mmerose--I have friends who are from Albania and every summer they travel back home to visit with friends and family. I gave them a small card to be given to a young mother in need of a little assistance. I put a $100 in the card and tell the person receiving my meager gift, that not all Americans are bad. In the card I wrote "I hope it made you smile." A small seed that may grow into something special. I give no return adress so my anonymous gift will linger in her mind long after the money had been spent. A little kindness played forward.
The same is true of marriage. It's not about the wedding, and certainly not the dress. It's whether you're still together 30 years later in a healthy symbiosis, taking care of each other and having a good time.
We know! We celebrated our wedding from July 11th anno 1965, with a delicious lunch at our favourite and local old restaurant. Just the two of us, as it is Summer and vacation for the rest of the family ;-)
More celebration later with our birthdays during this Autumn; "Fine dining" is nicer than diamonds when you are over 85! You get treated like Royalties! ;-)
So one of the things I have learned about the passage of time is that people you care about can disappear, and when they do, they leave a hole that is impossible to fill. For me, at least, when I am with a friend, I am a little different than I am with other people, and I only get to be this way when I am with this particular friend. It is a gift that someone you care about gives to you. These people let you be more the way you want to be, just by being with them. The hard lesson, as a Buddhist would say, is that when one of these friends dies he takes some of you with him, if only because you discover, with a sort of amazement, that the person you got to be when you were with the friend who died is gone.
2024. I was 79 and wondering how long I still would be able to pull my travel trailer around the country; so, I embarked on a "Farewell Tour" of my own to see 5 people who meant the most to me but did not live nearby. Before I could get to two of them, they died. You never know when it will be too late.
How wonderful that you made that "Farewell Tour" and at least were able to visit with 3 of the 5 again who meant the most to you. You have those recent memories of them forever inside. You're so right that we "never know when it will be too late". Thank you for your comment Linda. Robert is right that "You can't make Old friends".
Some of us are old enough that we can't expect to last long enough to form long-term friendships. That doesn't mean we don't make new friends. But friends from elementary school leave an empty space when they are no longer there.
I'm sorry for your loss. I only have old friends on Facebook and haven't seen most since 1968.
We have lost so many younger people in our area due to "deaths of despair" from the loss of jobs and much of our way of life. We lost another one in his forties that was close to our family last week.
It seems the decisions that affect our lives are made by people who are indifferent to the consequences for the rest of us. We need to turn that around by participating in the midterms.
Professor, youth is wasted on the young. At least if we know that we’re not doing our best and need to try harder it’s probably a sign that dementia hasn’t settled in yet. Thank you for the reminder.
When my wife and son had a 75th birthday celebration in my honor I was so flattered. Recalling, when asked to toast, I said the following, " Friends are the fruit of life." and as I looked out over friends who complimented me with their presence I turned to my son and said, " Haven't I assembled a lovely orchard. "
Thank you my friends for your company on this voyage.
Each time an old friend dies (let's call it what it is), part of my memory bank goes with them. I swear I will remember them in significant ways into the future, but memories of them(and with them) pass quickly. Each of us is like a book - we can take it out of our library and read the memories with joy (or passion). But when the volume is gone from our library, visiting it again quickly becomes impossible. Think of all the knowledge and memories that disappear as each of those volumes becomes inaccessible... Your post has touched me deeply.
I remember my grandmother's grief when her oldest friend died; they've been dearest friends since early childhood, went to school together, kept close contact through two wars and at least three marriages though living far apart from each other.
My grandmother became a hundred years old, she had to renew her circle of friends three times, and each time the friends became younger. She was a member in the local bridge club for decades, so it was relatively easy for her to meet new people, especially as she was bright till the end. She loved the company of youth, but one day complained, that the "young people are so mentally inflexible."
While I'm getting older I often wonder, why it seems so difficult to establish communication in between generations. Perhaps we must be both, young and old, more welcoming and more generous with understanding.
Yes, Bob, it is the same here. Friends have passed away, at reasonable age, but that does not help very much. I use the old telephome to reach my old friend of 89, who I know for 60 years now. He has many health problems amd now suddenly a swollen leg.
Use the phone before your travel to heaven starts, I tell him. It is a bit unpolished joke, but he laughs about it. His wife (81) too.
Earlier this week I lost a dear old friend in Limburg been friends since I was teenager.we kept in touch by phone an computer. We had great times when I went home and they came here (Australia) for their stay with me. Never nice when they they die.
Looked who you are... Life is worth living, seeing your picture of Trum and Infantino, under the Belgian Manneke Pis... I rolled over the foor with laughter...
My guess is that you have literally hundreds of old friends, and not just the ones spanning the four decades of your political career.
Of course you have thousands of new friends, at least as far as we are concerned. We've shaken your hand and talked briefly, and everything about your engaging of us reeks of friendship.
So like thousands of other unsubstantiated friends, we raise a glass to you and all those lucky ones for whom the connection is more than fleeting.
The difference between a "friend" and friendly is the amount of personal one-on-one time spent together. Thousands of use (even old people) appreciate Robert, but don't confuse that with being "friends" unless we spend one-on-one time with him. (Even though, given a chance, we would love to spend quality one-on-one time with him.)
I agree with you David. That is why Old friends are so special because we have spent years of interacting with them and engaged in activities face to face and before technology was even invented. I really like what you said..."The difference between a "friend" and friendly is the amount of personal one-on-one time spent together". So true David. A true "friend" is priceless and should be cherished. Thank you.
I am so sorry for your losses, realized and pending, and for all of ours.
I find myself surprised, sometimes, which deaths catch me by the throat.
My most recent friends are the ones whose loss I most dread. With reason, as they are all in their 80s, 90s, or even 100s, as well as wise and brave and witty.
Thanks for writing this post... with today's all-and-every t hing, old friends and grandkids remind us of life's greatest meaning. This brought tears to my heart with misty eyes. I'm re-inspired to make the effort to connect as I have. We all need this joy!
Life is so precious... fleeting. Thank you, Bob!!
Beautiful and agree!
I don’t know you personally Professor Reich but I consider you my friend because you and I share so much in common.
Ditto Keith....I feel the same way about Prof. Reich and truth be told all of you. So many of you I feel are friends. I thank you!
I too lost two old friends this year, both of them since childhood. Sometimes something will come to mind and I think I need to ask "friend" about that or I can't remember some fact or other and I think, "friend" will know and I'm ready to call..... and then I'm brought up short by reality and the loss. Like family members we love who have passed away, friends too are always with us, one way or another.
Annie, I've been lucky not to have lost an old friend recently, as far as I know, and the shame is that I haven't been in touch with enough of them to know whether they're even alive. I extend my sympathies to Bob, who must have suffered a painful loss. Thank you for reminding us, sir, that old friendships are to be treasured.
You can't make old friends when you're young.. as true friendship develops over time..
My mother certainly would have refuted your proposition! She kept up her Eastern Star sisterhood from childhood. She participated in a "club" of High-school friends from the 1930's on to death. She had another circle of friends she kept in touch with from Class of '40 UC Berkeley. She made and kept in touch with friends from trips abroad from 1963 and 1968 and 1970 until her death age 91. I helped her print and send two-page Christmas letters to a list of nearly 200 friends in her latter days. There was no clock running on "friendship" with her. Me, I enjoy a quip with a stranger.
Mmerose--Friendships are like seeds--some wither and die others stand the test of time.
Mmerose--I have friends who are from Albania and every summer they travel back home to visit with friends and family. I gave them a small card to be given to a young mother in need of a little assistance. I put a $100 in the card and tell the person receiving my meager gift, that not all Americans are bad. In the card I wrote "I hope it made you smile." A small seed that may grow into something special. I give no return adress so my anonymous gift will linger in her mind long after the money had been spent. A little kindness played forward.
Mmerose, even if we never cross paths again, thanks for that meaningful corrective elaboration, including final quip!
"A friend is someone who helps you up when you’re down, and if they can’t, they lay down beside you and listen./ Winnie The Pooh"
_ And they are happy with you when you are happy! / M.D. :-)
The same is true of marriage. It's not about the wedding, and certainly not the dress. It's whether you're still together 30 years later in a healthy symbiosis, taking care of each other and having a good time.
We know! We celebrated our wedding from July 11th anno 1965, with a delicious lunch at our favourite and local old restaurant. Just the two of us, as it is Summer and vacation for the rest of the family ;-)
More celebration later with our birthdays during this Autumn; "Fine dining" is nicer than diamonds when you are over 85! You get treated like Royalties! ;-)
As Joni Mitchell sang, "you don't know what you have 'till it's gone."
My deepest condolences.
Old friends are the blessings and treasures of a long life. To lose one is indeed a tragedy. I am very sorry for your loss.
So one of the things I have learned about the passage of time is that people you care about can disappear, and when they do, they leave a hole that is impossible to fill. For me, at least, when I am with a friend, I am a little different than I am with other people, and I only get to be this way when I am with this particular friend. It is a gift that someone you care about gives to you. These people let you be more the way you want to be, just by being with them. The hard lesson, as a Buddhist would say, is that when one of these friends dies he takes some of you with him, if only because you discover, with a sort of amazement, that the person you got to be when you were with the friend who died is gone.
Craig Nova
Brook Trout and the Writing Life
#kindlequotes
2024. I was 79 and wondering how long I still would be able to pull my travel trailer around the country; so, I embarked on a "Farewell Tour" of my own to see 5 people who meant the most to me but did not live nearby. Before I could get to two of them, they died. You never know when it will be too late.
How wonderful that you made that "Farewell Tour" and at least were able to visit with 3 of the 5 again who meant the most to you. You have those recent memories of them forever inside. You're so right that we "never know when it will be too late". Thank you for your comment Linda. Robert is right that "You can't make Old friends".
Some of us are too old for such a tour, but welcome the many new ways of communicating - zoo, face-to-face, and ll the social internet connections..
We consider ourselves fortunate and never as lonely as those of years gone by.
So sorry for
Your loss. I lost two friends in their 70’s. I still miss them.
but you can still make new friends, and with time they will become old friends.
Some of us are old enough that we can't expect to last long enough to form long-term friendships. That doesn't mean we don't make new friends. But friends from elementary school leave an empty space when they are no longer there.
I am sorry for your loss.
Some of us don't have that kind of time left. My new friends are wonderful; but they cannot ever become "old friends".
I'm sorry for your loss. I only have old friends on Facebook and haven't seen most since 1968.
We have lost so many younger people in our area due to "deaths of despair" from the loss of jobs and much of our way of life. We lost another one in his forties that was close to our family last week.
It seems the decisions that affect our lives are made by people who are indifferent to the consequences for the rest of us. We need to turn that around by participating in the midterms.
Professor, youth is wasted on the young. At least if we know that we’re not doing our best and need to try harder it’s probably a sign that dementia hasn’t settled in yet. Thank you for the reminder.
But for the fortunate - "wasted productively"
- think about the importance of "play" for "learning" for the very young
When my wife and son had a 75th birthday celebration in my honor I was so flattered. Recalling, when asked to toast, I said the following, " Friends are the fruit of life." and as I looked out over friends who complimented me with their presence I turned to my son and said, " Haven't I assembled a lovely orchard. "
Thank you my friends for your company on this voyage.
Each time an old friend dies (let's call it what it is), part of my memory bank goes with them. I swear I will remember them in significant ways into the future, but memories of them(and with them) pass quickly. Each of us is like a book - we can take it out of our library and read the memories with joy (or passion). But when the volume is gone from our library, visiting it again quickly becomes impossible. Think of all the knowledge and memories that disappear as each of those volumes becomes inaccessible... Your post has touched me deeply.
I remember my grandmother's grief when her oldest friend died; they've been dearest friends since early childhood, went to school together, kept close contact through two wars and at least three marriages though living far apart from each other.
My grandmother became a hundred years old, she had to renew her circle of friends three times, and each time the friends became younger. She was a member in the local bridge club for decades, so it was relatively easy for her to meet new people, especially as she was bright till the end. She loved the company of youth, but one day complained, that the "young people are so mentally inflexible."
While I'm getting older I often wonder, why it seems so difficult to establish communication in between generations. Perhaps we must be both, young and old, more welcoming and more generous with understanding.
I'm sorry for your loss, professor. Losing a friend truly leaves a hole in your life... you have my condolences.
Yes, Bob, it is the same here. Friends have passed away, at reasonable age, but that does not help very much. I use the old telephome to reach my old friend of 89, who I know for 60 years now. He has many health problems amd now suddenly a swollen leg.
Use the phone before your travel to heaven starts, I tell him. It is a bit unpolished joke, but he laughs about it. His wife (81) too.
Earlier this week I lost a dear old friend in Limburg been friends since I was teenager.we kept in touch by phone an computer. We had great times when I went home and they came here (Australia) for their stay with me. Never nice when they they die.
Looked who you are... Life is worth living, seeing your picture of Trum and Infantino, under the Belgian Manneke Pis... I rolled over the foor with laughter...
I am so pleased it gave you a good laugh I couldn’t stop laughing either when I saw it either. Omly wizh it would have hit his head.